Pain is a Blessing

 You don't realise that you are still bleeding from past wounds till something tries to hold that part of you again. You forget about the wound until you realise it never really healed completely. I have been reminded of many wounds I considered healed over the years. But one day or the other, something would strike that place again, only for me to learn how to care for it properly; instead of trying to lock it away somewhere far from the reach of my mind. 

I, for one, dreaded the haunting task of reviving my ghosts, fearing their chokehold on me. I was repelled by the idea of reliving the past in fear that I would lose myself in there, I would never come out of those woods alive. I feared the pain that reached the very fibre of my being with every breath I took in the graveyard of my heart. 

The fear washed away with the realisation that pain is an inevitable part of our lives, it is there to make us feel alive. Pain shows us the parts that still need our love and care for us to become the best version of ourselves. And it is because of this realisation that I sit here today, on this inhospitable night, trying to understand why the ancient ruins of my consciousness seem lush with existence today.

With this effort to look into my soul comes a great wave of gratitude. I am grateful for the fact that I have an opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of who I am today, and who I need to be right now to become a better version of myself than I was yesterday. That is all my wounds need me to do whenever they trigger the unhealed versions of myself. All because those unhealed pieces of me need me. They need me to attend to them with the utmost care and compassion, need me to carefully wrap them in the warmth of my heart.

I welcome all the pain locked away in the vaults of my mind, so that it may fly again and set me free from its shackles. Once and for all.

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