Drawing stars around your scars

 Sometimes I miss the old version of myself; before all the heartbreaks, before all the trauma. I wish I could go back to my old self again, to find that version of me. But I realise that can never happen, it's not possible. Sometimes I think that old version of me still exists somewhere beneath all the pain. But you cannot go back to being a version of you that doesn't exist anymore. 

Think of your pain, your heartbreaks and everything you go through as a wound on your skin. With time, that wound heals, and it eventually leaves a scar, that is more or less permanent. You cannot erase that scar, and your skin cannot go back to being how it was before the wound, but your skin adapts around that scar, and soon that scar becomes a part of you and a part of who you are. It becomes a part of your identity. 

In the same way, the emotional scars you have, you cannot erase them, undo them, or be who you were before the heartbreak, but you can learn to live with them, adapt yourself to them, accept them and make them a part of who you are. Instead of trying to become the old version of yourself, accept the transformation and rise like a phoenix from the ashes of that self. Instead of trying to find the old self, you try to find out who you can be in the present moment and who you want to be in the future. 

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